Ray yu as the non-bachelor

Well the impossible has happend...I am engaged. I only say this because I was such a freaking moron when it came to dating and romance. There are so many times when I think about the way I approached dating and romance and I just feel apauled. Man, I couldn't have been more of an idiot. But at least I learned a lot about myself, and was able to take some of those expereinces and grow from them. To those that had to endure my childish behaviour during over the years, I truly apologize for my actions.

Anyways, so this year is our 3rd anniversary. While it hasn't seemed like it's been 3 years, it also feels like we've been together forever (in a good way). Deb and I are very much in love and God is constantly helping us grow to be better people. It's been 3 years and I still feel excited every time I see her when I get home on the weekends (although I hide it), and I know she's still crazy about me. We've had our share of fights, but not without growing from each of those times.

As for the engagement, there is a video that's on the way. Dave Kim has been working hard on it for thhe last 7 months, and hopefully it will be finished before 2010. =(
HURRY UP DAVE! haha...jokes...thanks for doing it!
So long story short, Deb and I started talking about getting married/engaged for a while, but we both thought that it would be something more for when I was done physio. Things changed when I began to think about Deb and her granny. Those 2 have a bond so special that very few people will ever understand. Teh fact that her granny was pushing 93 really made me think about whether or not she would be around for our eventual wedding 3-4 years later. I knew that both Deb and I would regret it if granny would not be able to see her fav grandchild get married, so I decided to more forward and propose to her (Deb of coruse didn't know I had decided this).

Anyways, so a few months before my planned proposal I did a lot of praying, planning and thinking. First I went around to all the people that were eventually going to be our bridesmaids/groomesmen and asked if I had their blessing. I also spoke to Deb's mom and also my parnets, making sure I also had their blessing. With that in place, I had to book a venue that was accessible for granny. Finally I decided to do it in a room @ the nursing home where granny lived.
Pics can be seen on my msn space (or if you ask deb)
Long story short, after 3 bags of rose petals, 60 candles, $600 worth of curtains, a 800 watt speaker system, 2 dozen roses,a lot of string and tape, and 10 helpers the venue was set. The plan was that I was to bring her to her granny's (because Sean "left something there the day before") on our way to a "fancy dinner" we planned a few weeks back. We got to the nursing home, and Deb and Sean went to pick up something upstairs while I ran down to our venue and stood @ the ready. Deb would eventually walk into a room that was candle lit, with rose petals on the floor, our song playing in the background, and had both our families waiting with candles in their hands. I was standing the middle with the roses. I got down on one knee pulled out the rock, and BAM....sealed the deal....haha...romantic eh?

Ummm...I think deb has a better version on her blog.....hahah...I'll post the vid is Dave Kim ever finishes it....

Man this blogging stuff is tiring...I think I'm going to sleep a bit first....

The one year update part 3

It's kinda funny how once a year around the summer time I get the urge to write in my blog again. I've been meaning to update this thing for weeks, and finally I've managed to get to a computer and not be distracted by reading bleach manga online. I think I'll do the usual and separate my update into sections. but this time I'll have them as different posts so you don't have to read it all at once....well that assuming anyone is reading this at all...ummm ok...so I guess the table of contents will go soemthing like

1. overview of the year
2. My life as Ray Yu the non-bachelor
3. My life as Ray Yu the student physiotherapist
4. Army related stuff

Since this post is so short I'll just start with the "overview of the year" section

Overview of the year 2005-2006
Well a lot a happend this year...for starters, I got engaged (see more in the next section/post). Ummm....not sure what else happend....haha....
<10 min pause>
Ummm ok I think I'll just write about what comes to mind

I think the main thing that I can talk about this year is school. If you don't know yet, I start doing my Master's of physiotherapy this year @ Mac. It's been awesome but also really busy and draining. Looking back I can really see how much time and energy that has taken (and continues to take out of me). For the last 10 months it's been class, study, eat, study, sleep, and go home on weekends to see Deb. My routine and life was getting pretty dry, and needless to say, I found myself constently exhausted. It wasn't just physically demanding, but also emotionally demanding as well. I found that the last couple of months were very...umm...I guess lonely....and things kinda slipped downhill from there. I started to loose motivation for school and was constantly wasting time trying to "refresh" myself with countless episodes of Simpsons, Family Guy, and Naruto. I guess what I was really trying to do was distract myself from my loneiness. School drudged on, and I maintained a great GPA but was soooo flat all the time. I finished off the last academic unit of my 1st year of PT and got a much needed 2 week break. It was during that break that I finally got to sit and chat with Shu (one of my best friends). I really thank God for Shu cuz we've always been able to maintain this relationship where were can instantly re-connect with each other no matter how long we haven't talked for. *Praise God*

Shu helped me see that the reason for my dryness was because I no longer had time to care about anyone. I've been spending the last 10 months worrying about my school, my fiancee, and my career. Aside from Deb, there was no one that I needed to care for. Even at shcool I saw how I gradually distanced myself from my peers. Some would be doing study groups and such, but becasue I always always more effective studying by myself, I stayed alone, and remained accountabile to only myself. It really wasn't until I talked to Shu about all this that I realized how important it is to have something or someone to care for/about (other than yourself). God helped me see the emptyness of chasing after wordly things, and since then I've been feeling so much better. All I can say is that God is good, and He answers when you call.

Moving on with the year in review... guess I'll mention that my family has been doing amazing. After many months of PMS/midlife crisii by my mom and dad, the arguing and fighting finally stopped. God brought peace back into the house, and things have been getting a lot better. My parents seemed to have found this cute romance that neither of them ever expeienced as a struggling couple trying to support a family. I'm happy that after all these years of toil, my parents are financially stable enough to enjoy life now. Jim is going into 4th year and things are going well. His GPA is slowly but surely going up, and he's begining to show a little more maturity with each passing month. I hope that he'll begin to sense the urgency of his situation (career wise) and take action soon. There are gonna be 1000's of new Kin grads next sept, and I hope he'll realize his potential and make something of his gifts.

I think this is it for the general update. The last year really has been a blur...prolly cuz I really have nothing to show for it expect some marks and a fiancee.

The 1 year update

Why do all my blogs always start with "this is my first blog in a long time"? Well probably because I'm lazy. So be warned, this will be VERY LONG, so as usual, refer to the table of contents and scroll to the section you want to read. Yeah I’m a bit of a freak when it comes to organization.


1.1 - School
1.2 - Friends
1.3.1 - Love and passion
1.3.2 - Passions and aspirations


The general update

There is a lot that I have to be thankful for this year. As I looked back onto my last blog I realize that it’s been a year since I left the army, and a year since I took time to reflect on all that’s been happening. Now that I am thinking about it, wow, a lot has happened.

1.1 – School
Well this was basically the story of “what”, but for the true reflection or “why and how” see the love and passion section

It’s been a year since I left the army, and when I started school last fall I had only one goal, and that was to give it my all. Let me paint the picture here, and please, this is for illustration purposes and not to “show off” (although it really isn’t impressive at).
Since first year I’ve been an average student getting along with 70’s and the occasional 80. I was not particularly bright nor insightful. This trend continued into my 2b term where I even though I tried my best, I still only ended up with a term average of 77 or something like that – ironically, that’s be EXACT same average that I’ll be getting EVERY term since 1A. My work terms were mediocre, because quite honestly, I was too young to be thrown into the work force. I know my kin stuff but I DID NOT know how to interact with people, and so my ratings were mediocre. So after my 3 work term in a physio clinic, I decided to quit co-op, which was a very timely decision because I got my worst rating yet (but that place was quite shady in itself)
***TURNING POINT #1 – See love***
So as you can see, in my 3A there was a turning point in my life, and that without a doubt was Deb. With that encouragement , I went into my 3A and for the FRIST time, broke above the 80 mark for my term GPA! It was a day to celebrate. I think you can all related to how frustrating it is for a student whom was used to getting 90’s in high school to rarely seeing an 80 in university! It was a big and constant weight on my shoulders. The term ends, and with that comes
TURNING POINT #2 – see previous blogs about the army.

So this is where the real update begins. It’s my 3B and it’s fall term. I knew at that time that I was going to apply for physiotherapy but I knew that I wasn’t going to make it this time around. While most people apply with their 3rd and 4th year marks, I was applying with my 2nd and 3rd year marks; keeping in mind that my 2nd year marks were garbage, and I only had 1 term to male a 77 into an 80 something. From my calculations, I think I needed a term GPA of 86 or something like that. So in other words: IMPOSSIBLE.
Knowing that, I started looking into the US schools, which were expensive and far BUT did offer the Doctor of Physiotherapy verses the MSc. Physiotherapy in Canada. Either way, I had to seriously consider that as an option because at that time is was my best option.
As the term progresses, the tension builds. While I was happy at first with just applying to gain experience for the next year, I begun to feel that I actually do have a chance at getting in on my first try. From what I heard, having a GPA of about 81 will most likely guarantee you a spot in the second round. This term was probably the hardest term of my life because not only did I have the hardest courses, but I also had to deal with the daily thoughts about “this being the term”, “do or die” kinda thing. Most of the time I was trying to convince myself that I should go to the US or to keep in mind that this was only meant to be a “trial run”.

But honestly, I had to give it my all. All I needed was one chance.

Then God intervened, and for to my utter amazement I came out of the term with a GPA of 88% which put me on the Dean’s Honors List and my application average at 82 =) It was good, but still, how good that average is depends on the pool of applicants that year.

For the next several months, and the excitement died down along with the confidence. My application went in on January 17th and I wouldn’t know about the interviews until late April. So in the meantime, I made the best use of my time and also applied to a few US schools. Without a hitch, I was accepted into these schools, but was not very excited.

~4-5 months later~

And then…...msg from my mom **read carefully**




































Yup I got the Mac interview and the UT interview (Western and Queen’s don’t have interviews)!!! AWESOME! So long story short, the UT interview was ok, but the moment I stepped out of the Mac interview, I knew I killed it.

~one month later~
It’s June 1st and the acceptance/rejection letters were supposed to be mailed out today. I’m all excited, but also scared. I finish my class at 9:20, and head to the library to do my lab report. Open up my email and I see “Congratulations” …so I’m like oh great, I won another free mortgage estimate, goodlife fitness pass or a years supply of Viagra.
But no…it was from Mac – After a 6+ month long roller coaster ride, I got in…wow….praise God.

1.2 - friends
It’s a sad day but also a great day because friends are leaving but moving on to better things. I can’t think of a better way to do this than to address some of my closets friends for the past few years

Alex Chinn [A-BOMB!]: I’ve known you for so long but never go to talk to you until this year, but non-the-less, you’ve been such a great friend. I want to thank you for those encouraging talks and challenges, jokes and pranks, laughs and tears. (well not really tears…I had to make that up to make the sentence flow)

Alex Wang [Stink Bomb]: I must say that it was after reading your emails from China that inspired me to share about everything. I have to say bro, we’ve had a weird be awesome friendship. It’s almost this sort of love-hate thing. As if we were almost always in competition with each other, but the honest to God truth is that I’ve always looked up to you and saw you as an example. Your dedication and passion astounds me, and gives me encouragement and strength. I know you’ll be one of those “good doctors” (see the passions section) and maybe one day we’ll work together once again.

Ben [BenZookA]: LOL…the only thing I can think about now, is how we touched our noses….ugh…haha….nothing but good times Bro. Make it big in HK Ben cuz I’ll be there to mooch VERY soon =)

Carter [C4]: haha…now that you’re back in BC I can finally say it. Carter’s jokes are so CORNY!!! HAHA….but you’re still second to Deb. Deb is the queen of corny jokes. We’ve had some good times….lots of good times! Lol…enough said…

Deb[hunnybunnybuns]: I will always love you 52

JT: I've watched you mature into such an amazing brother. JT now you're free, and now you can really live up to your potential. You will touch the hearts of many, but right now I'm just glad that I've had the pleasure to be touched by you. Keep it up bro.

Sean Law [Bodmonz] – What started out as Love-Hate, is now just Love. You’ve been such a great friend over the years, and if there is anything I can say about you, is that you’ll always be dependable. You’re one of those that I know God will use to do AMAZING things, and someone I’m proud to call one of my best friends.

Shu Ling [Bodmonz] – Probably one of my best friends, we’ve known each other for what seems forever now. From you I’ve learned so much about my faith and life. Can’t even start to thank you enough, but that’s because I know you’ll always be continually challenging me and making me a better person.

Steph: I think you’re the only girl here. Well sheesh….almost too much to talk about here. It’s been good times, and I’m glad you’ve been around to help when ever there was “trouble in paradise”. In you there is so much potential, and if only you weren’t so busy, I think you could live up to that potential. I pray that you can be focused on your goal and not loose sight of what you want, but take the time to discover your passions.

Vin [nitrogylcerVIN] – possibly the greatest host in the world. Always insightful and ready to listen. Also one of the funniest people I’ve ever met! I’ve always thought that you have this massive hidden potential…it’ll be a great day when I see you achieve when I know you’re capable of.


1.3 .1 - love and passion
This section is really the “meat” of all sections. In here I hope to be real with everyone and not only tell you about what happened, by why it did, and what it meant to me.

Without a doubt the biggest turning point of the year was Deb. My one and only. I have no doubt that when God put us together, he meant for us to stay together, and through her I can see God’s AMAZING promises about marriage. I find it no coincidence that the term that we started dating was also the term that I got my first above 80 term average. It’s it no coincidence that as our relationship matured, the things around us began to shimmer with God’s blessing. Our academics continued to improve as we learned how to support and encourage each other.
And I have to type this because it REALLY shows how amazing God is, and how He will bless you infinitely if you just trust Him.

Fall term - pre-dating
R:77
D:70’s

Winter - Start dating
R:84
D:83
Fall
R:88
D:92 --> crazyness
Winter
R:90
D:88

***AND AGAIN*** the only thing I’m showing off is God’s GLORY! I know that posting actual numbers will confuse people but I just don’t think that saying “we improved” isn't enough for me to fully show how God has been working in and though us.

Additionally, my family has fallen in love with deb. Only through her was my dad able to break from his old China man stubborn ways, and begin to enjoy life and learn how to love. My dad would talk to deb about marriage problems before he talks to me! Whoa! Crazy!

Finally let me conclude this section by giving some not so great examples. I won’t be too specific here. The most dear example that comes to my mind is my brother. Since probably grade 6 I’ve known that he possess far more potential in almost everything compared to me. Even as a 1st year university student I would still discretely “copy” his fashion sense and try to mimic his interpersonal skills. But truly, as I began to grow wings of my own, his were taken from him. For 3 long years I saw all the potential of my brother trapped and locked away. He became a different personal to me. One that had secretes and a double life. But by God’s grace, they recently broke up, and wow, I’m starting to see all that potential once more. The energy is one that I haven’t felt in a LONG time. I’m so happy for him right now. I guess I similar story goes for another close friend of mine whom recently broke up with his girl. Although I’ve never knew the inner workings of their relationship, I knew he deserved more. And it pains me to see him down about his breakup when I’m seeing it as God giving him a chance to pursue something even greater (no not a girl…but maybe). And without a doubt, he recently got that chance. I really pray that he can take this opportunity to “rock the show” and look to the wonderful things that lie ahead.

It really comes to show how powerful relationships can be, and if there is one thing that I would say to all of you, is for you to NEVER settle for less. God himself says that your wife/husband WILL be PERFECT for you. If you have a “checklist”, that checklist should only have 1 question, “is she perfect for me?”

Anyways, I think anyone can easily read what I write and think that I’m pompous and a show off, but I’m here to say NO. This is God’s work, and not my own. This is His blessing that I don’t deserve. But for me to take these blessings and not give thanks, that would truly be wrong. Please excuse me if I couldn’t put in better words.


1.3.2 – Passions & Aspirations
The most puzzling question for me is why do people do things that they don’t LOVE? And I’m starting to realize that it has a lot to do with PASSION. Yesterday at CCF we were talking around campus picking up garbage and afterwards, my buddy Herm sat down winching in pain. He took his shoe off, unwrapped his tensor, and revealed a heavily swollen foot. For some strange reason I got really excited and began to look at it. I’m not quite sure why, but I think that had something to do with passion. For years now I’ve wanted to be a physiotherapist. And while in the early stages my passion wasn’t refined, it was the dedication to refinement that allowed God to bless me. In those years leading to now, I’ve had AMAZING opportunities to work with amazing people, and all thanks to a dedication to learn. I’ve worked with a 7 time Canadian Chief Medical Officer for the Olympics, a world renowned back specialist and great sport sociology prof.
I really want to thank all those people I’ve worked with because of their passion for their work. You have TONS of people that are knowledgeable, but few that are passionate. Right now I’m at a point where people all around me are graduating and going on to the next step but still have no passion. I think this truly is the thing that I fear the most.
Can you imagine a doctor that is treating you but has no passion about health care? It happens! Just like when I was talking to Herman about his ankle and he told me that I had educated him about his foot for the first time and the Doc didn’t say anything to him except for “stay off it”.
Yeah I know that passion is a gift, but that doesn’t mean you sit on your ass and wait for passion to come to you. Go out and find out what you’re passionate about!

**Here is where I share something that is VERY personal. **
I’m in Kin and in kin there are many people who aspire to be physios and docs, and I also know a lot of science people that also have similar aspirations. I understand that there are smart people and there are hard working people but sometimes it’s just so unfair in my eyes how things work out. I know a kin student who’s been working in a clinic for years, is passionate about her work, and is a great therapist, but because she decided to take more challenging and interesting courses, she didn’t have the marks to get an interview for physio. Likewise, I also know of people that NEVER had any passion for physio. That never even would have thought about volunteering until I told them, but because they’re smart (I don't deny that they work hard), they would get the interview. This is COMPLETELY bias and I know that, but that’s what I think. It’s sucks because I really hate seeing the system fail this way. This is why there are so many bad Doc’s and clinicians. Yes FOR SURE academics are important, but do you really need to score in the 97th percentile of your MCAT to be a good doctor? No. I’m sure 80% would suffice. How about physio? I’ve worked in a clinic for 2+ years, worked with renowned specialists and worked my fingers to the bone because of my passion, but if I didn’t get that 88%, I never would have made it. And to think that someone with a slightly higher mark and close to 0 experience would get in? That pains me, and eventually it’ll hurt the system.

What I really want to say is that in the competitive society we live in today, we all NEED to take the time to discover our passion. Not to be rich and famous, but to use the gifts that God gave us to it’s maximum potential. And like my econ prof Larry Smith would say, competition in society is a good thing because it ensures that resources are used in it’s most beneficial areas (theoretically) – and I agree with that. Why waste a med school spot for a passionless genius when they can be better utilized somewhere else, and someone with real passion can make the most of that spot in med/PT school?

Aspirations – with all that being said I’ll write a bit about what I’ve been thinking about and where I think God wants me. That’s right, it’s WHERE and not WHAT.
The biggest question for me right now is where, because I intend to be a great phsyio. Not in terms of prestige, but in terms of contribution. One of my goals is to be a therapist in the Olympics; a small way to fulfill a childhood dream. More so, I want to grow the profession. People need to know that you DON’T need to go to the doctor’s office for a sprained ankle, THEY CAN’T HELP YOU!...unless you just want some pain medication, going to your GP is useless (mostly). My Passions are really about public education and professional/scientific development.
Considering that, I really do want to work in the US a bit because that is where I can find the resources to do the work I dream of. Additionally, research in the US, Australia, Europe, is quite a bit ahead of Canadian research. I hope that you can all pray for me so that I’ll be guided once again to the place where I can be fully utilized.

Summer Reflections and Fall Aspirations

I guess this is the post where I really have to sit down and think about things...(picture my brain completely empty except a monkey scratching his head)....Ahhh...okok...

For starters I like to say thanks to Mel, Liv, and Grace for forgiving me and taking time out to chill with me! It's so awesome to still have friends that really "go way back" I can definatly see how all of us have changed over the years but none the less there is still so much support and love....and plenty of jokes as well =) Mel's house is still the party house cuz at any one time you'll fine 8-10 people there just hanging out.

As I think about this past summer and the school year that's just a week away, I'm really eager to see how I'll be different this year. I know I've changed, but in what way? hmmm....*scratches head with dumb look on face*......

One thing I really wanted to share was my experience with the Army and God. I don't know where to start...it's...it's....different. I went into the Army with big dreams of doing God's work and wanting to share my faith, but none of it happend as I planned. The first time I was able to tell anyone about Jesus was outside of a strip club(*ask me or see my "A week tille I'm gone again" post for full story). The second was next to another soldier's bed as he laid there looking for relief from his paralizing back pain. Everything I was used to changed and I had to change with it. I have to admit, eveyrthing was very counter intuitive. There was this one guy who always said to me " hey Yu, F*ck YU!" and I would just ignore him...that is till one day I gave him the finger...he came over and punched me....haha... no....he came over gave me proops and then sat down to talk to me! He told me all about his family and his career plans and all because I gave him the finger! I'm not saying that this will work for all instances...but it really opened my eyes. The world isn't as black, white, and grey as I learned in church or at fellowship...it's more like black, four, and chicken...IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE! .... we need to embrace the crazyness!

Another thing the army taught me is to not be afraid to be yoruself....your TRUE self....stop spending time seeking other people's approval, but spend it seeking their friendship. I remember my buddy Pte. Ho. I was a school boy nerd and he was a chinese version of 50 cent...haha...he would always diss my style and I would do the same, but in the end of the day...he was my boy and we looked out for each other.

At the root of it all, I really hope that I can somehow combine my all that I've learned as a soldier with my walk with God. To be meek but assertive, quick to listen but never ignored, gentle but strong, humble but proud.

Fall Aspirations
I remember my section commander MCpl Karr saying once, " The body is the laziest thing is the world. Overcome it, and you can overcome anything". This saying can't be more true. Having physical disipline not only gives you phyical strength to accomplish things, but also trains your mind to constantly drive your body.
So I want to start a group that will help teach people about health and nutrition as well as applying the physical discipline to other aspect of their lives....that was just a little tid bit...anyways...gotta run...I'm going for a run....no pun intended =)

Back in Action - Sapper Yu

Hello all! Well with the blink of an eye it's been 6+ weeks, and I am now a qualified combat engineer (a Sapper as we call it). Without a doubt, this course was much harder than my last one. It was so much more demanding physically, mentally, and emotionally. I barely know where to start describing my QL3.

I can say that is was daily struggle to maintain a balance between mental stabiliy and emotional sanity. I woke up everymorning dreaming it was TO only to open my eyes to see nothing but green. To wake up in the freezing cold morning at 5am to get ready for physical training takes a LOT of motivation. The long hours and lack of sleep also takes its toll on you as your body degeneragtes and you mind follows suit. Ugh....just thinking about it is rough. A lot of times homesickness, lonliness, and boredome add to this burden and it leaves many of the soldiers no choice but to drink away their problems or punch someone out. Half way though the course, we bagan our demolitions training, and if anything was worse than blowing yourself up, it was falling asleep during demo class. They made you PAY. So on top of everything now half of us (including myself) were on caffine pills to stay awake (but for me they only neutrallized the drowsiness my ibuprofin pills caused. I needed to keep my knee from exploding). I don't really know how to end this section. I'll just say that at the end of 6 weeks many of us wanted to fight each other and if this course were 7 weeks long, there definately would have been some brawls.

Physically, this was definately the most challening course for me, and I think I can safely say it's the most physically challening thing I've ever done in my entire life. I realized that in the army they have no need for strong or fast soldiers, they need robust soldiers. Soldiers that can wake up at 5am, workout, spend a day doing exhaustive training, sleep for 4 hours, and do it again and again for 6 weeks. There were days where I did 400-500 push ups a day (I called those weekdays), and there were days where I ran till I puked, but heck, that's what I joined for right? LOL...
In Gagetown you can pretty much find chin up bars on every single building and plently of open areas for pushups. I think I got in better shape...not really sure tho...I feel stronger but after you minus the injuries, I think I'm about the same. LOL...

Adios!

Hello all,
Well today I'll be heading off to Gagetown New Brunswick for my combat engineer course. I might say that this time around I'm not as stressed about things. I came back from my SQ 2 weeks ago dreading the day that I'd have to leave again for QL3, but now that it's here, I'm actually pretty excited. I thank God so much for taking care of every one of my concerns and burdens. From family to friends, to banking and my girl, I feel confident and ready.
It's been so awesome since I got back 2 weeks ago. I've been waking up early everyday, and boy do you get a lot done when you're up at 7-8 verses 10-11. I feel so satisfied because I was able to see about 99% of my friends (Shirles, Mel, Grace and Liv - I'll make sure I see you gals before I head back to loo!), get my Grad school stuff underway, and even play some ball with my boys!
It's awesome how energized I feel entering this course. Right now I can only see the finish line. 6 weeks seems like it'll be nothing. In no time will I be back in TO packing for Waterloo =)

Before I go I just wanna give all praise and glory to God and ask that you pray for me while I'm gone. There will always be days that you ask yourself "why am I doing this?", days that drain every ounce of your strength, but there is work to be done. God's work, which I'm determinded to do (see end of SQ blog).

Got a plane to catch now...see you all in 6 weeks

Peace, Love, and Blessings,

pte. Yu

Update on my Physio dreams

After I got back from course, I've since picked up where I left off with my Physio dreams. For those that didn't read my massive update, I am planning to apply to physio down in the states when I graduate. The reason being that the US now offers an entry level PhD of Physical therapy, verses a Masters here in Canada. I've been doing a lot of thinking and here is a little run down of what I'm thinking:

1. In terms of school I've decided that the name isn't all that important. I made the first mistake when I chose Waterloo instead of York (which offered me 8G's in scholarship money). In the end, if you don't have the marks, you don't get in. Likewise, gradutating from Creighton U or Harvard U makes no real difference, a PhD is a PhD. Sure tacking a name like Harvard on the PhD would sound nice, but...wait,hang on a sec...*flipping though pages*...what the?...Creighton is ranked much higher than Harvard! (in terms of physio)...LOL...bet you didn't know that...well...neither did I. Point proven.

2. With that in mind, I'm taking the advice of MANY people and I'm going to choose strickly on MY personal needs, one of them being distance. I don't want to be more than 6 hours from home.

3. Cost - it's funny how one school's tuition can be 13G's a year and another would be 30G's a year...I think a tour of campus would solve that mystery.

4. Campus and Facilities - Must be well equiped and somewhat pleasant. Guess that rules out Brooklyn U

5. Gut feeling - The way the admin and staff communicate can make a HUGE difference. Having someone reply to your emails within 10 mins (U of Michigan) vs 2 weeks (UT)makes a huge difference.

So based on those criteria (and some others I didn't list) this is list so far (in no particular order)

University of Michigan
Andrews University
Upstate New York Medical Univeristy
State U of New York at Buffalo
University of Pittsburg

I've begun some sort of preliminary application with a few of these schools already and they seem VERY enthusiastic! I might even get early admission! Well, that's about it for now! I'll keep you all posted!


God is Good!

Ray

A week till I'm off again

It's been a pretty awesome week so far. I think I'm finally back at 100%, but I'll be heading off again in a few days. For the next 6 weeks I'll be in Gagetown, New Brunswick at the Canadian Forces School of Military Engineering. Thankfully, this time around I don't feel as nervous, and I feel like I'm ready to take on this next challenge. At first I was very intimidated by the length of this course but after my SQ, I feel like I can do this. Part of it has to do with the strength of my girl Deb. It has been a phenomenal blessing to see her mature so much in the short weeks I was gone. From taking care of her family, to my finances, to looking after my parents, she has been my strength, and I thank God everyday for having her. Anyways, enough of the mushy stuff...on with the blog.
The real purpose of this entry was for me to share a vision that I've had for this upcoming course. It all starts with a painful reflection of my SQ. SQ was a tough time for me, and I have to say that my lack of patience and obedience really took away from God's glory. The army is by far the HARDEST mission field I have ever ventured into, and unless you've been there, it's hard for most of us to even begin to understand it. With that in mind I want to share 2 stories.
This first is set in the town of Owen Sound. After 2.5 weeks of training, the troops finally earned a day off, and most of us decided to head down to Owen Sound for the day. Me and my 3 other buds went into town looking for something to do and after walking around town, going to the mall, we decided to get a drink and meet up with other troops. We ended up at this place called the Harp. We walked up stairs and it was a pretty dark and grungy place, but the odd part was that there was a stage....with brass rails?! LOL, without knowing it we found ourselves in a strip bar. At the time there was no music or anyone "performing" and against the will of my boys, I went downstairs for a walk. At the time I was very content will being able to walk out of there but I also had an urge to pray for them...so I did. Shortly after that my battle buddy walks out! He's your somewhat typical Canadian born Viet, and for whatever reason he walked out to keep me company. Although I told him to go back in and chill (cuz it's the only time off we had) he stayed and we talked. He was curious about why I was out there. He knew about my girl and the kind of relationship I was in but he still didn't see what was so bad about it...from there a talk about Christian relationship turned into an investigative bible study. From Jesus' life to his teaching, I had the chance I prayed for...and it was all done outside of a strip club.
The other story is in regards to my other 2 friends, the ones that I let down. There is not much to say here. I just didn't have the patience or love. They were both very prideful people, often putting more effort into looking strong rather than getting strong. (Strong, being a term used for almost everything, not just physical strength). I had a lot of trouble with this. I put more effort in trying to put them down (hoping they would see the futility of "fronting") rather than trying to use God's love to help them. However, I know God is calling me, telling me that this next course is my second chance. This time I know what I need to do. As Rick Warren put it, delayed or partial obedience is disobedience. Obedience unlocks understanding.

On that note, I'm going to end with a verse that I will use to drive my service to Him

"No, but I will surely buy it for the full price; for I will not take what is yours for the LORD, or offer a burnt offering which costs me nothing." 1 Chronicles 21:24

Peace,

Ray

back form my SQ

It's the first morning since I got back from my SQ (soldier qualification) course and I can definatelty say that I notice the change already. For starters, I woke yup at 6 and felt like doing PT (physical training) and then proceeded to clean (what we call station jobs in the army). Now that I finished cleaning, I thought I would blog a bit before I got lazy =).

I want to dedicate this first part to Pilot Danny. Not realy sure who he is, but the comments he left were definately encouraging. Everything you wrote was bang on. The challenges were endless; be it ehtical, moral, physical, emotional, or spiritual. But God is good, and I made it back. I definately agree wiht him that most people don't value the price that soldiers pay to ensure the freedom that each of us enjoy. Freedom is too often taken for granted.

Anyways, time for some fun SQ stories. After 4 weeks of my SQ I can look back and really say that I've changed a lot. I know what it means to work hard and I appreciate the simple pleasures of being able to see the people you love on a daily basis. If you're one of those out there that have a crap ass job and are always complaining think about what the common soldier has to go through. Every morning starts at 5am, we go outside and do PT for an hour, change, and then clean the quarters. The quarters themselves are clean enuf that you can eat off the floor. After that is breakfast (at 7am) and then classes etc. all day. The average day can range from digging a giant trench 3x1x1 meters in rock hard clay, to learning how to operate a C6 GPMG (general purpose machine gun). Lights go out at 11, but eveyrone always has to stay up till about 12-1 to get stuff done for tomorrow (and no, there is no other time alotted for you to do personal admin stuff) Some days are harder than others, but will always contain a certain amount of "motivation" (ie. yelling) and cock (a term used to describe impossible assigned tasks aimed to get us into more trouble - ie. 30 seconds to change into full battle order).

On top of that, there is inspection. The most feared word in the army. EVERYTHING has to be the same as everyone else and EVEYRTHING has to be PERFECT. Let me give you a few examples. Toothpaste - the body, cap, and threads must be completely free of toothpaste; as if you just bought it. Toothbrush - same thing, look like it just came out of the box. Underwear - folded 8" x 8", t shirts folded 10" x 10" EXACTLY, Straight lines, pointy corners. Rifle - must me carbon free (an impossible task), ejection port closed, hammer down, 1 mag length from the mags, sling swivel forawrd, take down pin up, sights at 200m, on safe. The spacing of EVEYRTHING (from towles, to boots, to the weapon, to the alignment/centering of the blanket and sheets on your bed) is identical to the 40 other troops int he platoon. The key is paying attention to DETAIL. But it's the small stuff that gets you, a tiny thread that you missed hanging off your shirt , a button on your jacket that's undone, hangers facing the wrong way, I think you get the point. There are about 40 daily used items that need to be cleaned until they're like new, and then placed precisely in the same spot as it was the day before. I guess you kinda get the point now.

The course itself was 4 weeks long, but 3 of them were spent in the classroom doing theory of machine gun fire, battle drill, section attack planning, etc. The final week was when we had to actaully head into the field and practically apply that info, and it was without a doubt, the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. First off, I was with a team of 3, with 1 person being completely useless and another that was smaller than I was. So the 2 of us had to dig a trench that was 3m x 1m x 1m; one of the most physically enhausting tasks I've ever done. It was literally 3 cubic meters of clay, rock hard clay. After the hole was done, I had the luxury of living in that hole for the rest of the time. The days were hot and long. We would be up at 5 doing patrolls, section attacks, and setting up wired fences and trip flares (very cool in my opinion). By evening it got very cold. We were right by the lake so there was a chilling breeze that swept through in the latter hours of the day. At the time I was wearing, 2 shirts, a termal shirt, a thick wool sweater, and 2 jackets...I was still freezing. I got about 1 hour of sleep before I got up to do my sentry shift (I maned a machine gun and looked for approaching enemy). After a long battle with hypothermia I would get to crawl back into my "fart sack" (sleeping bag) and get another hour of shut eye. The morning begins with the sound of grenades and artilery shells and I have to get out about as fast as possible and stand guard for 30 mins. This cycle repeated itself for a week....Oh yeah, forgot about about the pouring rain...
After a day or so, I was already completely filthy. No shower, no change of clothes, no anything. My hands felt like sand paper by the time I was done and I'm still trying to get the dirt out of my hands. We also had the luxury of eating IMP's (individual meal package). They weren't that great. Well how good do you really expect "sheppard's pie" to be when it was cooked and put into a bag 3 years ago?

Anyways, this is getting kinda long so I'll end with a little reflection. These 4 weeks were definately the hardest 4 weeks of my life. It challenged every part of me, and on top of that I was away from all the people that would normally be there to support me. Needless to say, I prayed a lot and did devo's as much as I could. God was the one who passed this course, not me. I know I've changed, but I'm not sure exactly what the change is. For one I feel more efficient. I'm FAST. eating, changing, cleaning, anything. Another thing is will power; it takes a lot to be able to tell yoruself not to quit when you're in the middle of no where standing a trench, freezing cold, and on the verge of hypotermia. To all those out there, I really hope you take some time to think about what I worte and think about how lucky we all are. I'm nothing and I haven't even begun to know what it's like to be a soldier, but think about those that are out there in risking their life to protect yours. It's hard to imagine that everyday when you go to work, there is a good chance you might die, but it's true. All of us have the luxury of coming home after a long day to a warm bed, a hot meal, and loving family, but little do we recognize or even appreciate the freedom we enjoy at the expense of someone else's life.

Back by special request!

haha....Alex left me the funniest comment....LOL....but yes I will try to blog more...=)

This will definately be my last post before I go.

Tomorrow is the big day. I will be going up to Meaford (near Owen Sound) for 4 weeks, come back for a 2 week breather and then I'll be off to New Brunswick for the remainder of the summer.

I dunno why but I feel somewhat nervous. Part of me doesn't want to leave. I guess coming back to TO reminds me of all the things here at home. Colluni, SCAC, all my friends from MAC...there is a lot here....but I also know there are great things ahead of me...

Whether phsyical, emotional, psychological or spiritual, it will be the challenge of a lifetime.

I see it as the beginning of life. After God traning and equipping me for 21 years, my life will finally start.

There are those that spend a lifetime dreaming, I intend to spend my life living...